OLYMPIA | In a shocking twist Tuesday morning, a bipartisan group of legislators announced Washington state would squash its outdated and regressive tax code in favor of a more streamlined and equitable “21st century” solution.

The groundbreaking move means that for the first time in recent memory, the state will actually be able to deploy revolutionary, forward-thinking services for residents, like: high-quality and affordable preschool, fully-funded K-12 education, debt-free higher education, paid family and medical leave for workers and a secure retirement for the elderly.

“Just yesterday,  low income families were paying 16% of their income in taxes, while the top 1% of income earners paid just 3%. Now we’re living in a state that supports working families and a thriving middle class,” stated John Burbank, executive director of EOI. “No longer will new moms and dads return to work too soon after welcoming a baby because they don’t have access to paid leave. No longer will families struggle to care for ailing parents or aging workers wonder how they’ll afford to live once their bodies can’t work any longer.”

Details continue to emerge out of Olympia on this new social contract, with officials finalizing negotiations across the aisle and some policy staff reportedly pausing in awe of watching good governance win out over political posturing.